Saturday, July 25, 2015

Nostalgia Review:: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, by J.K. Rowling

Title: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
Author: J.K. Rowling
Series: Harry Potter, #5
Format: Hardcover
Rating: ★★☆☆☆

Still good?

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

I don't remember liking this one that much. I do remember being oh-so-sad about Sirius' death. This time, I was just like, "Oh, you dropped a bridge on Sirius to try and make us feel bad. That's poor writing." Most of the plot is that Harry is a stupid git (I know he's a teenager, but come on...) or that Umbridge is oh-so-evil. Consider 870 pages of this, and I'm just left bland.

There's this whole thing where Sirius is (according to some of the characters and me) getting Harry a bit mixed up with James. Basically, he's creepily trying to recreate his biffle out of his biffle's son. But whevs. What really creeps me out about it is that his biffle at Harry's age was kind of a jackass, which we already knew, but is rubbed in even more.

And I know, I know. James grows up. But fuck. There's some kinds of assholery that you just don't get to sweep under the rug. Like abusive bullying. I don't care how awesome you grow up to be. You don't just get to go "boys will be boys" to that shit.

But anyway, the plot basically arises because Dumbledore decides not to tell Harry anything even though he knows really bad shit might happen. Because that's exactly what 15-year-olds need. A headmaster of a school would certainly know how well that works on teenagers. Needless to say, it all goes to shit, Harry does things that are stupid (but heroic!) and the Ministry, which has had its head in the sand, is forced to acknowledge that Voldemort is, in fact, around again.

In other words, the plot relies on everyone holding the idiot ball. Dumbledore. Sirius. Harry. All of Harry's friends. And everyone knows how much I like idiot ball plots...

Oh, and centaurs are basically the ~wise savages~ stereotype. Yay for more grossness! Again, it's like, "You're British... do you know what you're doing???" Speaking of, the whole house elf thing comes up again, and we find out that Dumbledore feels for the house elves. Of course, despite being like, the strongest wizard evar, he hasn't done anything about the fuckedupness of it all.

Yeah. I'm disgruntled.

If I recall correctly, Half-Blood Prince isn't as heavily full of things that make me angry and/or idiot balls. I hope. I sincerely hope. It's also not as long.

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